New Old Habits
by MsRaven
Summary: Post-Ep for Home. It's time for another one of their talks. Weir-Sheppard Friendship.


**New Old Habits**

**Summary:** Post-Ep for Home. It's time for another one of their talks. Weir-Sheppard Friendship.

**Disclaimer:** Stargate Atlantis and its characters do not belong to me.

**Spoilers: **Everything up to Home.

**Author's Note: **Okay, so my shipper little heart wants its own explanation of Elizabeth's alternate reality. This is a standalone. Not a Conversations story.

* * *

John's not sure he should be here, but his hand comes up to knock anyway. 

"Come in Major Sheppard."

He walks into Dr. Weir's quarters. She's sitting on the bed with her arms wrapped around her knees, looking a little vulnerable. That's not normal. He tries to think of something outrageous to see if it'll happen. She quirks an eyebrow at him and he points at the door.

"How did you know it was me?"

Elizabeth smiles when she figures out what's bothering him.

"It was only a good guess, Major. Don't worry, this is real. You're back in Atlantis."

"Kay. Just checking."

John pulls up a chair and sits next to the bed. Neither one of them says anything for a minute.

"Is there something in particular you needed, Major?"

"Not really. Just falling into new old habits."

"You've lost me."

"Well I can't call it an old habit because we haven't been here that long, but it's not new either because we've done it a few times."

Elizabeth looks confused.

"Our post-debrief debriefs."

"You mean the talks we usually have after your missions?"

"Yeah, those. We haven't had the one for this mission yet."

"But I was on the mission with you."

"Not the whole time."

"Did something happen in your reality that you want to talk about?"

"Nah. Like Hammond said, I pretty much knew what was going on."

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"I get the feeling that something happened in yours that you may want to talk about."

Elizabeth pulls her knees a little closer to her chest. The position does make her look vulnerable and he's not sure he's ready to see this side of her. She apparently feels the same way because, after a moment, Elizabeth gives John a brave smile.

"I appreciate your concern, but I'm fine."

"Okay..."

Sheppard should drop this. He's never been good at being the "sensitive guy". It never worked as a good dating strategy. Then again, that's not what he's after here, right?

"You can talk to me, you know." Weir looks a little skeptical. "Don't look so surprised. You don't have the exclusive on being a good listener. I'm here if you need me."

"Thank you, but there really isn't anything to talk about."

"I don't me to pry. Okay, I do mean to pry. But you always say it's better to talk about it."

"You're not going to drop this, are you?"

"Not planning on it, no."

Elizabeth sighs, but starts talking.

"There were little things that were wrong. Things that didn't feel right. But up to a point, I wanted it to be real even if I knew it was wrong."

"What was wrong?"

"Simon."

"And Simon is?"

"Who I left behind."

"Oh."

"I sent him a video telling him that I was leaving for Pegasus and probably wouldn't be coming back."

"I thought everyone had enough time to say goodbye in person?"

"We did."

"But you didn't go."

"No, I didn't."

"Because you thought he would talk you out of going?"

"Because I knew he couldn't. I was going to Atlantis. I had made my decision and Simon - Simon didn't factor into that."

"Yeah...that's probably something you don't want to hear from your girlfriend."

"Not the best way to say goodbye, but he still deserved better than what I gave him. Simon was my security blanket. I would go off on these horrendous trips and he'd always be there to hold me together after. I loved him, but I wouldn't let our relationship move beyond where it was."

"So this is about guilt?"

"Maybe. And maybe a little about my being selfish."

"Not usually a word I would use to describe you."

"That's good to know. But with Simon, I was. I want to believe that he'll always be there to welcome me back, even after this."

"I think you're giving the guy too much credit."

"What do you mean?"

"Girls – I mean, women – are always reading too much into things like this. Guys are simple. We're happy or we're not. If Simon wasn't happy, he would have left."

"How do you know that?"

"I don't. But you don't know that I'm not right either."

Elizabeth looks thoughtful for a moment and John continues.

"Let me ask you this, in the video, did you ask Simon to wait for you?"

"No."

"And if you found out he got married and had kids?"

"I'd be happy for him."

"Doesn't sound that selfish to me."

"I think you're making it more simple than it is."

"And I think you're making it more complicated than it needs to be."

"This is part of the man-woman thing you were referring to?"

"Yup. I think God – or whatever the hell made us how we are – had a twisted sense of humor."

Elizabeth can't help but laugh a little at that. A comfortable silence settles between them.

"So how was your reality?"

"A little weird. One distraction after another. Every time I would think about you or Atlantis, someone would come walking through the door."

"You thought about me?"

"Well, yeah, I kind of promised you that we were in this together."

"In my reality, you helped relieve me of my command in favor of a military leader."

"I wouldn't do that to you, no matter how dangerous I think it is here."

"I know. That's when I realized something was very wrong."

"It's ironic, isn't it?"

"What is?"

"They created those fake realities thinking we wanted to go home, but we spent most of our time trying to come back to Atlantis."

"They didn't understand how important it was to finish what we started."

"Do you think we'll ever go back to Earth?"

"I don't know, but I do know one thing."

"What's that?"

"It's good to be home."

_The End._


End file.
